”IO” and others

Hermann Hesse - German-born Swiss poet, novelist, and painter

If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn’t part of ourselves doesn’t disturb us.

C.G. Jung - Swiss psychiatrist

Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.

Roy T. Bennett - Author

Stop comparing yourself to other people, just choose to be happy and live your own life.

Pete Carroll - American football coach

The only competition that matters is the one that takes place within yourself.

Michelle Gielan - One of the brightest stars in positive psychology and an eloquent champion for rethinking the way we communicate

Social comparison that leads to unhappiness is the downside of social media.

Melvin Udall (Jack Nicholson) - From the movie "As Good As it Gets" (1997)

You make me want to be a better man.

Richard Wiseman - Professor of the Public Understanding of Psychology at the University of Hertfordshire in the United Kingdom

When you gossip about another person, listeners unconsciously associate you with the characteristics you are describing, ultimately leading to those characteristics’ being “transferred” to you. So, say positive and pleasant things about friends and colleagues, and you are seen as a nice person. In contrast, constantly complain about their failings, and people will unconsciously apply the negative traits and incompetence to you.

Marshall B. Rosenberg - American psychologist, mediator, author and teacher

All violence is the result of people tricking themselves into believing that their pain derives from other people and that consequently those people deserve to be punished.

Marshall B. Rosenberg - American psychologist, mediator, author and teacher

Analyses of others are actually expressions of our own needs and values.

Marci Shimoff - Celebrated transformational leader and motivational expert

The best way to keep relationships happy, healthy, and supportive can be summed up in one word: appreciation. What you appreciate, appreciates. When we demonstrate our appreciation for the support we receive from others, it reinforces that behavior and deepens our connection to them.

Viktor Frankl - Austrian neurologist, psychiatrist, philosopher, author, and Holocaust survivor

No man should judge unless he asks himself in absolute honesty whether in a similar situation he might not have done the same.

Robin Sharma - Canadian writer, best known for his The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari book series

What the society thinks is of no interest to me. All that's important is how I see myself. I know who who I am. I know the value of my work.

Robin Sharma - Canadian writer, best known for his The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari book series

Big people don't make people feel small.

Esther Hicks - American inspirational speaker and author. She has co-written nine books with her late husband Jerry Hicks, presented numerous workshops on the law of attraction

The greatest gift you can ever give another person is your own happiness.

Martin Elias Pete Seligman - American psychologist, educator, and author of self-help books

Authentic happiness derives from raising the bar for yourself, not rating yourself against others.

Ayn Rand was - Russian-American writer and philosopher. She is known for her two best-selling novels, The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, and for developing a philosophical system she named Objectivism

If one doesn’t respect oneself one can have neither love nor respect for others.

Ayn Rand was - Russian-American writer and philosopher. She is known for her two best-selling novels, The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged, and for developing a philosophical system she named Objectivism

The smallest minority on earth is the individual. Those who deny individual rights cannot claim to be defenders of minorities.

George Burr Leonard - American writer, editor, and educator who wrote extensively about education and human potential

The more you move in rhythm with someone, the closer you become with that person.

Nathaniel Branden - Canadian–American psychotherapist and writer known for his work in the psychology of self-esteem

There is overwhelming evidence that the higher the level of self-esteem, the more likely one will be to treat others with respect, kindness, and generosity.

Abraham Harold Maslow - American psychologist who was best known for creating Maslow's hierarchy of needs, a theory of psychological health predicated on fulfilling innate human needs in priority, culminating in self-actualization

Be independent of the good opinion of other people.

Abraham Harold Maslow - American psychologist who was best known for creating Maslow's hierarchy of needs, a theory of psychological health predicated on fulfilling innate human needs in priority, culminating in self-actualization

Let people realize clearly that every time they threaten someone or humiliate or unnecessarily hurt or dominate or reject another human being, they become forces for the creation of psychopathology, even if these be small forces. Let them recognize that every person who is kind, helpful, decent, psychologically democratic, affectionate, and warm, is a psychotheraputic force, even though a small one.

Maxwell Maltz - American cosmetic surgeon and author of Psycho-Cybernetics, which was a system of ideas that he claimed could improve one's self-image leading to a more successful and fulfilling life

Self-improvement is the name of the game, and your primary objective is to strengthen yourself, not to destroy an opponent.

Deepak Chopra - Indian-American author and alternative-medicine advocate

I am totally independent of the good or bad opinion of others.

Don Miguel Ruiz - Mexican author of Toltec spiritualist and neoshamanistic texts

If someone is not treating you with love and respect, it is a gift if they walk away from you. If that person doesn't walk away, you will surely endure many years of suffering with him or her. Walking away may hurt for a while, but your heart will eventually heal. Then you can choose what you really want. You will find that you don't need to trust others as much as you need to trust yourself to make the right choices.

Don Miguel Ruiz - Mexican author of Toltec spiritualist and neoshamanistic texts

Whatever happens around you, don't take it personally... Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.

William Glasser - American psychiatrist

To achieve and maintain the relationships we need, we must stop choosing to coerce, force, compel, punish, reward, manipulate, boss, motivate, criticize, blame, complain, nag, badger, rank, rate, and withdraw. We must replace these destructive behaviors with choosing to care, listen, support, negotiate, encourage, love, befriend, trust, accept, welcome, and esteem. 

John Calvin Maxwell - American author, speaker, and pastor who has written many books, primarily focusing on leadership

Stay focused instead of getting offended or off track by others.

Lucius Annaeus Seneca - Roman Stoic philosopher, statesman, dramatist, and in one work, satirist from the Silver Age of Latin literature.

Away with the world’s opinion of you – it’s always unsettled and divided. Away with the pursuits that have occupied the whole of your life – death is going to deliver the verdict in your case. ... It’s only when you’re breathing your last that the way you’ve spent your time will become apparent.

John Eliot - Decorated professor of management and performance psychology

Perfectionism is simply putting a limit on your future. When you have an idea of perfect in your mind, you open the door to constantly comparing what you have now with what you want. That type of self criticism is significantly deterring.

John Eliot - Decorated professor of management and performance psychology

Exceptional thinkers ignore their critics and go about their business making history.

Wayne Walter Dyer - American self-help and spiritual author and a motivational speaker

True nobility isn’t about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be.

Carrie Frances Fisher - American actress and writer

Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

Daniel Goleman - Author and science journalist. For twelve years, he wrote for The New York Times, reporting on the brain and behavioral sciences

Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom large. But when we focus on others, our world expands. Our own problems drift to the periphery of the mind and so seem smaller, and we increase our capacity for connection - or compassionate action.

Paulo Coelho - Brazilian lyricist and novelist, best known for his novel The Alchemist

Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.

Vernon Linwood Howard - American spiritual teacher, author, and philosopher

A truly strong person does not need the approval of others any more than a lion needs the approval of sheep.

Jack Canfield - American author, motivational speaker, corporate trainer, and entrepreneur

What others think about you is none of your business.

Brian Tracy - Canadian-American motivational public speaker and self-development author

Look for the good in every person and every situation. You'll almost always find it.

Eckhart Tolle - Spiritual teacher and best-selling author. the tower

Give up defining yourself - to yourself or to others. You won't die. You will come to life. And don't be concerned with how others define you. When they define you, they are limiting themselves, so it's their problem. Whenever you interact with people, don't be there primarily as a function or a role, but as the field of conscious Presence. You can only lose something that you have, but you cannot lose something that you are.

Eckhart Tolle - Spiritual teacher and best-selling author. the tower

Anything that you resent and strongly react to in another is also in you.

Lao Tzu - Ancient Chinese philosopher and writer. He is the reputed author of the Tao Te Ching, the founder of philosophical Taoism, and a deity in religious Taoism and traditional Chinese religions

When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everyone will respect you.

Lao Tzu - Ancient Chinese philosopher and writer. He is the reputed author of the Tao Te Ching, the founder of philosophical Taoism, and a deity in religious Taoism and traditional Chinese religions

Care about what other people think and you will always be their prisoner.

John Wooden - American basketball player and coach

There is nothing stronger than gentleness.

Denis E. Waitley - American motivational speaker, writer and consultant

A smile is the light in your window that tells others that there is a caring, sharing person inside.

Denis E. Waitley - American motivational speaker, writer and consultant

The price of success is to bear the criticism of envy.

Todd Henry - Author, international speaker, consultant, and advisor

Our relationships will eventually grow stale unless we are diligent about directing and cultivating them.

Stephen Covey - American educator, author, businessman, and keynote speaker. His most popular book is The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People 

Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us. 

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

Don't be afraid of enemies who attack you. Be afraid of the friends who flatter you. 

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures bristling with prejudice and motivated by pride and vanity.

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

When we hate our enemies, we are giving them power over us: power over our sleep, our appetites, our blood pressure, our health, and our happiness.

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

Be wiser than other people if you can; but do not tell them so.

Dale Carnegie - American writer and lecturer, and the developer of courses in self-improvement, salesmanship, corporate training, public speaking, and interpersonal skills

Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, ‘I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you.

Amy Cuddy - American social psychologist, author and speaker. She is known for her promotion of "power posing", a controversial self-improvement technique whose scientific validity has been questioned

Focus less on the impression you’re making on others and more on the impression you’re making on yourself.

Jordan B. Peterson - Canadian professor of psychology at the University of Toronto, a clinical psychologist, and YouTube personality

Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not to who someone else is today.

Tim S. Grover - CEO of Attack Athletics, Inc., which he founded in 1989, and author of the international bestseller Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable

Talk never goes up in price, it’s always free, and you usually get what you pay for.

Tim S. Grover - CEO of Attack Athletics, Inc., which he founded in 1989, and author of the international bestseller Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable

People who don’t pursue their own dreams probably won’t encourage you to pursue yours.

Brendon Burchard - #1 New York Times best-selling author and "the world's leading high performance coach". His latest book, High Performance Habits, was a The Wall Street Journal best-seller and named by Amazon as one of its top three best business and leadership books of 2017

We must overcome social- and self-oppression if we are ever to join the ranks of the free souls who love their lives and lead their people.

Brendon Burchard - #1 New York Times best-selling author and "the world's leading high performance coach". His latest book, High Performance Habits, was a The Wall Street Journal best-seller and named by Amazon as one of its top three best business and leadership books of 2017

We must overcome social- and self-oppression if we are ever to join the ranks of the free souls who love their lives and lead their people.

Daniel G. Amen - American celebrity doctor who practices as a psychiatrist and brain disorder specialist as director of the Amen Clinics

Stop worrying about what others think of you. Base your thoughts, your decisions, and your goals on what you want and what is important in your life.

Daniel G. Amen - American celebrity doctor who practices as a psychiatrist and brain disorder specialist as director of the Amen Clinics

18–40–60 rule. It says that when you are eighteen, you worry about what everyone thinks of you; when you are forty, you don’t give a damn what anyone thinks about you; and when you’re sixty, you realize no one has been thinking about you at all.

John C. Maxwell - American author, speaker, and pastor who has written many books, primarily focusing on leadership

Comparing yourself to others is really just a needless distraction. The only one you should compare yourself to is you. Your mission is to become better today than you were yesterday. You do that by focusing on what you can do today to improve and grow.

Austin Kleon - New York Times bestselling author of five books: Steal Like an Artist; Show Your Work!; Keep Going; Steal Like An Artist Journal; and Newspaper Blackout. Kleon's works focus on creativity in today's world

The worst troll is the one that lives in your head.

OliviaFox Cabane - American author, public speaker, and the co-founder of Kindearth.Tech

Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

OliviaFox Cabane - American author, public speaker, and the co-founder of Kindearth.Tech

Most of us tend to interpret events—whether they’re personal or impersonal—as relating to us.

Brené Brown - American professor, lecturer, author, and podcast host

Healthy striving is self-focused: "How can I improve?".
Perfectionism is other-focused: "What will they think?”

Brené Brown - American professor, lecturer, author, and podcast host

Staying vulnerable is a risk we have to take if we want to experience connection.

Jon Kabat-Zinn - American professor emeritus of medicine and the creator of the Stress Reduction Clinic and the Center for Mindfulness in Medicine, Health Care, and Society at the University of Massachusetts Medical School

Look at other people and ask yourself if you are really seeing them or just your thoughts about them.... Without knowing it, we are coloring everything, putting our spin on it all.

Earl Nightingale - American radio speaker and author, dealing mostly with the subjects of human character development, motivation, and meaningful existence

Our attitude towards others determines their attitude towards us.

Thich Nhat Hanh - Vietnamese Thiền Buddhist monk, peace activist, and founder of the Plum Village Tradition, historically recognized as the main inspiration for engaged Buddhism

We can feel lonely even when we’re surrounded by many people. We are lonely together. There is a vacuum inside us. We don’t feel comfortable with that vacuum, so we try to fill it up or make it go away. Technology supplies us with many devices that allow us to “stay connected.” These days, we are always “connected,” but we continue to feel lonely.

Arnold Lazarus - South African-born clinical psychologist and researcher who specialized in cognitive therapy and is best known for developing multimodal therapy

If you concentrate on having fun instead of worrying about your image, many things will work out better for you.

Barry Schwartz - American psychologist. Schwartz is the Dorwin Cartwright Professor of Social Theory and Social Action at Swarthmore College and since 2016 has been visiting professor at the University of California, Berkeley. His work focuses on the intersection of psychology and economics 

We have a tendency to look around at what others are doing and use them as a standard of comparison. 

Robert K. Cooper - Neuroscientist, New York Times bestselling author, and a leading high-performance business

Don't Compete, Excel.

Robert K. Cooper - Neuroscientist, New York Times bestselling author, and a leading high-performance business

In excelling you save time and energy that would have been spent comparing yourself to others and fighting others, and you apply that time to being your best.

Gay Hendricks - Psychologist, writer, and teacher in the field of personal growth, relationships, and body intelligence

Criticism and blame are addictions. They are costly addictions, because they are the number-one destroyer of intimacy in close relationships.

Grant Cardone - Businessman and writer, the author of the bestsellers and influential expert in the sphere of SEO international company. He founded the first online university for the sellers, where they are taught how to sell goods and services effectively, how to promote them, and achieve success in this as well

Weak and overwhelmed individuals respond to others' success by attacking it.

Grant Cardone - Businessman and writer, the author of the bestsellers and influential expert in the sphere of SEO international company. He founded the first online university for the sellers, where they are taught how to sell goods and services effectively, how to promote them, and achieve success in this as well

Anyone who minimizes the importance of success to your future has given up on his or her own chances of accomplishment and is spending his or her life trying to convince others to do the same.

Grant Cardone - Businessman and writer, the author of the bestsellers and influential expert in the sphere of SEO international company. He founded the first online university for the sellers, where they are taught how to sell goods and services effectively, how to promote them, and achieve success in this as well

The moment you start thinking someone else's gain is your loss, you limit yourself by thinking in terms of competition and shortages.